'Tired!! Tired 's not a word used in my vocabulary. Bodily fatigue is nothing to the cause that I belong.'
This was one of my Nan favourite's expressions and was apparently her lines in a play at work. She had no recollection of what the context was and we've never found out either. Do you think I'd have any luck googling it??!!
In recent weeks, that expression has summed up my world. I either seem to be shopping or asleep. I can only manage about an hour at a time in a shopping centre and then I come home and go back to bed. Thank goodness for internet food shopping and the help I get from family and friends. My mum has been here a lot recently and it has made a difference to the house. My friend today hoovered and cleaned my kitchen floor and did the ironing at such a blistering pace that it made me realise how slow and lacking in energy I am. As all of you that know me, know - I am not normally a slow or lazy person but at present I'm operating at about 2% of normal and that is on a good day!! I can not believe what my life has come to - sleeping and sitting sewing and knitting. Ok - so those who knew me in the 1980's will remember me for always having knitting on the go but recently I'd never had the time so in some ways it's lovely to have the time but I now feel pressurised to finish all these things I've half completed. Never was good at the 'starter-finisher' thing. I must finish a cross-stitch for Woody and then complete the icebergs that the cross-stitched penguins have been perched on for the last 10 years. I suppose I could claim that global warming just melted the icebergs in the intervening years - can I get away with that do you suppose.
No more strange parcels and the fairy light problem has been solved by hubby buying new LED lights so now the hall is lit up by blue lights and the lounge with red and the new penguin lights. My smiley balloon is still inflated but it is doing a grimace now instead of a smile but it still does the trick. We finally opened the box of sweets tonight and found amongst other goodies, the updated version of spacedust. I thought it had been banned. The children loved it and kept giggling at the sensation and the noise it made in their mouth. It was a really funny moment!!
This last week has been full of Nativity and School plays. AJ was a narrator but did mumble when I watched but was apparently better on the day I wasn't there. The twins year did a take on Cinderella. 2 of the boys did dress up as the Ugly Sisters. They were excellent and even managed to dance in high heels although I think they both need lessons in how to sit on the floor with a dress on!!
I've also seem to have spent a lot of time wrapping up presents for teachers, admin staff and the nursing staff. I decided to make a hamper for the oncology staff as the week before I kept seeing the nurses coming out with boxes of chocolates so wanted to do something different. It was fun buying things for this and Laura really enjoyed decorating the box with her godmother. The box was covered with gold crepe paper and she decorated it with feathers and a big notice saying thank you to the staff. It looked really good.
The good news this week at oncology was - I've got an extra week off before my 6th cycle of vinorelbine. Hurray!!! They put this down to me needing the week as I'm anaemic and have very few white blood cells but really I think they were looking for people to move as they need to get 5 days of clinics in 3 days after christmas. It suits me - my family are down so that clears the day for me and hopefully, will give my immune system some time to recover. My mouth is so sore all the time now but not ulcerated and has been for the last 3 weeks. I'm using nystatin as it seems to be helping me and preventing the ulcers. I had a very strange experience at the GP surgery when trying to get more nystatin. (it is a treatment for oral thrush and even very young babies can have it). I needed more and asked for a repeat prescription but was told by the receptionist that it wasn't on my list so could not have it. I couldn't believe that I'd been in 2 weeks before and asked for morphine and was given it without question but couldn't get nystatin. Morphine could kill me and anybody else who feels like downing the bottle but nystatin wouldn't really harm you at all. Perhaps, they were trying to tell me something!! I asked her to try as it seemed a waste of an appointment to see a doctor and did get it!!
Because my mouth is sore and I've lost my appetite, I've lost about 10kg since the summer. I know I needed to lose weight but this is now getting quite a lot to lose and my clothes don't fit anymore. I'm in a dilemma whether to get more clothes or see if I continue to lose or regain it in January.
This week though I don't think I will be losing more weight. I've been out today for lunch and will again on wednesday. Then we're eating with friends on friday night as some mutual friends are back from their 5 month journey through South America. Hopefully, they have not bought back samples of guinea pig and locusts for us to try. Then saturday night, it's hubby's family christmas meal and then it's Christmas Day, Boxing Day and then my family descend and then New Year. Is it really possible to have so many social events centering around food in such a short space of time when I've lost my appetite and taste buds?
As Zebedee said - Time for bed!!! (now)