Holiday Bliss and Chemo Tiredness
Managed to get up at 7am although we weren't ready to leave till 9am. Where does that time go when all the bags are packed and it's only the car needing to be packed???!!
Good journey down there and met friend in caravan with her boys playing the electronic version of monoploy!!! £25 million to put on a credit card - they loved it though not sure we play by the rules!!!
We went to tescos - the local one very small and quiet considering it was a saturday afternoon. Got what we needed and I'd bought my supply of frozen soup with me!!! We then went to a place where you get frozen, organic indian food. We ordered some for tonight and infact the children all liked it which was a first (well Laura has eaten curries before and AJ seemsto like curry flavoured crisps). I ate soup again!!! Still felt very breathless all day and had to use my nebuliser again. I also painted my nails black as it's supposed to stop your nails falling off when on taxol. They didn't fall off last time - I just had stripey nails and it looked like an odd nailbar paintjob. Hope the same happens this time or less.It must be so uncomfortable without nails. Can already feel some tingling in my finger tips. Have serious thoughts that they did give me a dose based on my 23kg and 3cm taller frame as I feel so tired and ill. Terrible stomach pains as well - good job I bought that heated gel pad thing as keeps hot longer than a wheat bag.
The children just spent time in the outpool having great fun.
I even managed to make some thank you cards and do a bit to Eeyore's cross stitch.
Sunday - Still felt so rough I stayed in all morning and everyone else went down the pool again. In the afternoon, we did venture into Ramsgate to find the tourist board. I was so tired I even used the disablity scooter around tescos - I borrowed theirs. That was an experience as it went so slowly and seemed to have to push and pull different levers to get it to work - a bit overcomplicated for me.
Still got really bad stomach pains which is not helping my mood which is very low. I was hoping that I'd feel better by now otherwise I'll have no good days between bad days and will have to rethink my plans.
Monday - starting to feel a little more human and as looked as if would be damp day, we went to Dicken's world in Chatham. It was good fun even if we got a bit wet on the boat ride but the holograms were good.
We did a bit of shopping at the outlet centre there and bought some size 14 jeans from M and S. It felt so lovely to wear clothes that actually fit instead of having to rely that a belt will hold them up and they get all puckered at the front. Also, went to Clarks to buy shoes for school. The electronic machine and the handheld machine was different each time for all 3 children so just gave up and didn;t bother waiting to see an assistant and just chose our own.
We then popped in to see my Uncle. I'm seeing him on wednesday on my own but we thought the children would enjoy a visit there which they did. He'd had trouble with mice in the house and so had had to put traps down and was doing funny faces where the mice appeared to died happy as their last meal was tuna!!! For some reason, his mice did not like chocolate!!!
We were going to eat at a Harvester we'd passed on the way there but as we drew in, there was a big notice saying 'opening 1st Sept' no good for us then. We just gave up and got takeaway pizza and I had a sort of rissotto mushroom thingy which was a bit of a struggle. Discovered the extra fine Creme Caramels from Tescos now so that makes a change instead of tapioca!!!
Took the boys to the club tonight but no luck on the bingo. Laura decided to stay in with her Dad and watch a dvd. Got back about 9pm and so exhausted I couldn't help with bedtime at all. Feeling quite useless at present not being helped by the fact all the children are going to Pete for cuddles and almost ignoring me!!! Went to bed at 9pm and woke up with a shock at 10pm as had fallen asleep with a drink in my hands and must have moved in my sleep as dropped the drink all down my front!!!
Tuesday - The children woke us up at 9am but still took us ages to get going despite 4mg dexamethasone. I just stayed in the caravan all day, finished Eeyore and did some memory books and made cards and slept. This is not giving me extra quality to my life nor improving my swallowing and now the lumpy area under my arm looks very odd. Pete took the children to St Margarets Bay or at Cliffe - I can't remember now. Apparently, they had a good time woith the stones and big waves etc. When they came back, the children were off in the pool again. Problem is, they always need an adult there so poor Pete always ends up down there!!
In the evening, we went to the club and ate there and played children's bingo and then i came home and they styaed on for about an hour. Actually, read to AJ tonight and spent some time alone with the children as felt I wasn't involved at all in their lives at present.
Still very troubled by stomach aches all the time but worse at night. Sometimes, it seems to give me diarrhoea but not always. It's horrible anyway.
Wed - my uncle came over and Pete took the children down to the local nature reserve so I had time on my own to discuss how I am and my cremataion plans, and what readings etc I want. As he is a Layreader and takes funeral services it was very useful to discuss with him what I wanted and to get the timings right etc. It must be the first time in about 20 years that I've spent anytime alone with him so it was a very special visit to me.
He left about noon and then mum came over at about the same time as Pete and children came back for lunch. Mum and I went off shopping - what a lot of traffic and not many shops. Had forgotten how expensive full price Mand S is when you're used to looking at the outlet. Bought an H and M top and mum bought me a watch. Mum brought over some tops from one of her friends so have some tops now that actually fit.
Pete and children been in the pool all afternoon and they all had skin rashes from the floats.
Decided to go out to eat with mum as easier and all too tired to cook and wash up etc.
Will write second part later.